Flowers Won't Doo

SpeedyDoo.com hears your sad story in 48198, and the story in 89513 is pretty good as well!

  • May 21, 2017

 

The Dood is having a busy weekend.  In 73078 there is a sad tale about a very bad salon treatment.  The sender writes that they pay top dollar to come to your salon because of the reputation you have. What you did to my hair is amateurish and stupid, but I know it will grow back.  I’m going on Yelp, and Facebook, and the next time I come in I won’t be sitting in your chair. A bad haircut can be a bummer.  The Dood thinks you came to the right place.  Your order is on the way.  

In 85260 someone knows that the person listed as Steve in your phone is really named Katy and she works at the supermarket.  
The Dood thinks it’s good to have a friend in the supermarket but not that kind of friend.  

In 68902 someone wants you to just do your job and to stop trying to do everyone else’s.  That’s a simple request! You have been served a little brown pile.  

Up in 48198 a person in a very responsible position is being asked to stop sleeping on the job.  Get more sleep at home, see a doctor, whatever.  The Dood likes to nap but not on the job.  

In 58703 someone thinks it’s terrible that you go through their phone.  Their exact words are please stay out of my business and my phone! - The Dood appreciates a good password and he has nothing to hide but nobody likes others even touching their phone. Get a grip - on your own 58703!  

In 80221 - You have to love this one… Never Call, Never Text, Never look at my FB, Instagram, etc.  Please leave my life, and you owe me $4.52. - It does not get any clearer than that!  A brown pile in a tin box is on the way.

In 89513 someone’s car got dented and you are being blamed.  “you asshole!  You hit my car and left the scene!  How do I know its you?  Because my Go Pro says so.  DBag!  The Dood is a fan of strong language!  Send us the video! 


Someone In 32569 is back from vacation and SpeedyDoo has a welcome back package for him.

  • May 19, 2017

In 32569 somebody thought it would be cool to go on vacation and post hundreds of awesome pictures while some of us had to work.  Beaches, Jet Skis, Dolphin Boats and cocktails.  Lots of really delicious cocktails!  - The Dood is as jealous as the person who sent this!


SpeedyDoo Goes to Washington DC Again!

  • May 14, 2017

In 20500, The Dood is missing the Cherry Blossoms, the National Galleries, and all the fine folks from a Ghost Of Restaurant in Fairfax, VA.  It's amazing that with all of that on my mind someone actually sent a SpeedyDoo to a person who is nouveau locale - The sender is worried about his health insurance, more specifically the fact that he has a pre-existing condition - high blood pressure.  Here's the deal.. If this guy loses his job the next job he gets might not offer him health insurance at an affordable rate because of his existing condition.  That sucks!  That means some insurance company will say to him... We cannot insure you.  This deserves your thought and a brown pile.  There are times when the rich should not get richer and health care is an issue where that should not happen. Trillions are spent on our Defense and we got that down good.  Lets keep the people our Defense budget protects healthy.  That makes sense, and the cost will be a thin slice compared to the defense budget.  Be great, Be Better, and Be Served... a brown pile.

 


Many SpeedyDoo Thanks! and What up with the bad tactics down south?

  • May 12, 2017

Somewhere in 03862 The DOOD owes many Thank You's and appreciation.  I hope you enjoyed the little gifts I "dropped" off and not on the carpet.  Also in 03862 someone wants you to display your gift in a prominent place.  I could not agree more.  The Dood owes you many thanks as well.  Down south in 2004 there is a person who takes a game a little too seriously.  Please concentrate on what you should be doing and try not to be a dirty dog.  BTW - you are going down for the count.  The Dood says that it takes all kinds.  UnProfessionalism at a Professional level is not tolerated.


SpeedyDoo.com helps stop a lunch thief.

  • April 27, 2017

Someone in 55806 owes rent money and grocery money to someone. It’s hard to believe that someone can go 4 months without paying rent. It’s time to get a job buddy. “You sit around all day playing video games, eating my food, and doing nothing. Get a job, and pay what you owe.” Nice life if you can get it! In 98005 somebody needs to mind their own business. “Keep your eyes on your own sad life and stop talking about mine” In 02139 there is a war going on in the kitchen. “I know you are the lunch thief” The Dood is glad to help here and this might be the story of the week.


SpeedyDoo.com to the rescue in 01952

  • April 18, 2017

In 44102, The Dood knows all about a co-worker who in the words of the sender “Has his nose so far up the boss’s butt that he can smell last week’s Chinese Food” The Dood hopes it’s not General Tso’s Chicken cause he loves that. Brown nosing seems to be in season since there is another instance of it in 78702 where someone reports a “total smooch butt” in a very crowded office. The exact words were “You are a total smooch butt” The Dood has to admit that he has never heard that expression before. This one is good, and I have to thank you for taking advantage of The Dood’s service. Someone in 15202 is being told that the whole world is sick of your moronic vacation photos on Facebook. Sometimes a friend can’t tell you but the Dood sure can. In 01952 a person on a condo board of directors is letting their little powers go to their head.


SpeedyDoo.com sends a pile to 84321

  • April 15, 2017

From up in 97202 the Dood hears a story about a contractor who ostensibly took someone’s cash for a job, pulled up a few boards, then went to lunch and then never showed up again despite multiple unanswered phone calls. “Someone thinks you are an asshole and a thief and if they don’t have their money back by the end of the week they will be charging you in a not so small claims court.” Sadly we hear this sort of thing with great frequency. In 84321 someone needs to know “ That they truly suck” for enjoying the company of a “lunch buddy” and then coming home each night as if nothing happens. 84321 needs to know that the sender of this package watched how you eat lunch with your friend in a restaurant on Thursday. In 50302 there is a disturbing story about a gum chewing waitress in a dirty uniform that needs to take a bath. Hey 50302! Someone feels strongly enough about this to plunk down the cash for a little brown gift. Take the message to heart please.